November 04, 2002
the transporter


transporters! more than meets the eye!

ok out of all the movies i saw this weekend. and i saw A LOT. as i think you can tell. or should be able to tell by now. (although let's just say that 4 in one day is not a record. not even close.) uhh...point i had a point. right out of all of them the transporter was by far my fave rave. why you ask in stunned stupefaction? well because of 1)shu qi and 2)jason statham and 3)kung fu kicky kicky! explosions! guns! racing in cars! bang! whirr! whee! there was even some skydiving for those of us who are so inclined.

the plot was dumb. but whatever more than made up for by having a former porn star, actress, model, pop singer and a fucking sexy ass man who runs around sliding in oil and kicking some bad guys with no shirt on. you can't go wrong. honestly.

besides the oil fight scene which incorporated the brill of those things you slide your feet onto while on a bicycle to pedal with, my favorite scene...well ok the 2nd most pornographic, and #1 suggestive scene, was when shu qi is tied up in the trunk and jason statham decides to give her a drink with a straw. but of course she has duct tape over her mouth and so he cuts this tiny slit in it so he can put the straw in and she starts sucking away. ok....bondage be my middle name i guess, but watching her drink thru a straw with tape on her mouth and her hair all messed up while she was trapped in a car with her hands tied behind her back = incredibly sexy. (although perhaps not as sexy to some as her porn debut, sex and zen. if you go to the link attached to "porn" above there's a picture of the two girls with a flute and let's just say there's a scene where that flute is being inserted in some places it shouldn't be and then going in and out both at the same time. ahem.)

the chase scenes were great, the fight scenes were even better. and i strongly recommend it if you are looking for a good mindless action film.

Posted by michele at November 04, 2002 10:40 AM

I agree, the taped-up-scene was a fine piece of cinematography (porn). And some of the fight scenes were Rockin' with Docken. But Jack Palance and the corporate badguy ruined it for me....

Posted by: Jacob on November 4, 2002 11:22 AM

you know the part that was the most detrimental to my health was whenever we had to look at the man-woman playing shu qi's father. what was UP with him/her? i was frightened. the make-up....the wierd skin tone....the....wierd.....

Posted by: michele on November 4, 2002 06:46 PM

That's Jack Palance! I loved him! Well, loved him so much that I hated him....

Posted by: Jacob on November 4, 2002 07:50 PM

Well, maybe i should clarify. That's China's answer to Jack Palance.

Posted by: Jacob on November 4, 2002 07:50 PM