Oh god what can I say? It was so amazing and at the same time so awful. You know how all Star Wars movies have the really cheesy elements: dialogue, scene transitions, etc? It had all of that in droves. But personally the thing which appeals to me the most about a Star Wars film is exactly that hackneyed writing style and 70’s kitsch. The originals came out in the 70’s after all and there’s just something so appealing and nostalgic about watching something that beautifully awful that makes me really, really completely happy.

However, in addition to the bad-good things there were some really good-good things. Prime examples being the Yoda-Dooku fight sequence. The little kiss on the cheek that Padme gives Anakin when he kills the tiger beast in the pit and pulls her up behind him on his fat lizard beast. Obi wan Kenobi. Really anything he did. I swear to god. Ewan Mcgregor is god. So really I’m swearing to him here. Holy shit but he’s brilliant. And gorgeous even with a partial mullet (oh god the hair). Natalie Portman. Primarily in backless, gorgeous flowing gowns. And telling a really poorly planned story about losing her virginity to Anakin. Necessary? Definitely not. But adorable? Oh yes. The almost complete absence of Jar Jar Binks was not half bad either. And getting to see Luke and Leia’s adoptive parents in their younger versions was fascinating. Really getting to see a lot of things when you already know what’s going to happen later was pretty great. Watching Obi-wan and Anakin is bittersweet when you know that eventually Anakin is going to kill Obi-wan. And that Padme will die. And that Yoda will die. And even that Anakin/Darth Vader will die. I saw the plans for the Death Star but I still do not understand the Darth Sidious/Palpatine connection completely. Lucas is holding out on us for the 3^rd one, which let me tell you is going to have to be fucking amazing. With this leading up to it and knowing the final four installments, a lot of shit is going to have to go down in Episode 3. And I, for one, cannot WAIT to see it.

I am going to see Episode 2 again next week. So I will try to have another installment for this with a little more technical detail.

Shit, did anyone else notice that Jar Jar, the worst character ever to grace the screen of course, had one good catch phrase? A catch phrase which I know some of us (Kristen) already know, use, and love? He said “muy, muy.” He did! Muy muy! Muy muy grande! Muy muy …..piccolo. or however that is spelled. There was some other really good line…..hmmm no memory of it now. However let us make a count of C-3PO bad one liners. How many actual puns did he spew? 2. How many more could be taken as puns? 2. How many other just really bad lines which were not puns, nor good, nor anything but really really bad? All of them! Yes! It’s a little weird how only Obi Wan gets good lines. It confuses me. But I think it’s not so much that he is the only one with semi-decent lines, as it is that he is the only one who manages to deliver his lines with anything even closely resembling flair.

What else can I say? Well I guess I can say that Jacob just cleared up the Palpatine/Sidious thing. With the obvious truth that I already knew but had briefly discarded because of something the ain’t it cool spoiler man said about the uncut version he saw which made it seem as if the two were really two different people or personalities flip sides if you will. One bogus theory discarded I guess.

I guess all else I really have to say is that for the naysayers out there who say George Lucas is raping our childhood (well #1 what childhood? Who among us was born when these started coming out? Clingers to the holy trinity we are. Whatever) but the thing is other than more special effects these episodes are the same as the other ones. All the same cheesy things are done. The writing is still heavy-handed with as little actual dialogue as possible to get all the main points across. All the acting is done by facial expressions and let’s face it some actors are better at this than others. Some of them just let the words slide off their tongues like regurgitated pasta noodles. And if that’s no good, well then, it’s no good. I think we can all agree.

Gene’s called now so I have to go! More later.

More later I promised. But I am apparently a liar. 1) because it’s taken me this long to write again. And 2) because currently I have nothing new to say. Blah. Onto other reviews.